The secret is - Fake it til you make it!
Imagine this scenario.
You are in an English conversation. Maybe there are several people and they have quite a good level of English. You understand, mostly, and laugh at the right moments (even though the jokes are bad). But you haven’t said anything. You want to say something, and you think the other people want you to. But you’re worried.
You remember times in the past when you’ve tried to speak in English and suddenly you can’t speak at all. You forget simple words, freeze up, feel embarrassed and feel…stupid. At that moment, it seems like the whole world is looking at you, waiting for your contribution. Thankfully, someone else guesses what you were going to say and finishes your sentence for you. The conversation continues, but you aren’t listening anymore, you’re just feeling frustrated with yourself.
Everyone starting to speak English will have moments when they forget how to speak.
This probably sounds familiar, because…it happens to everyone. Everyone starting to speak English will have moments when they forget how to speak. Most people continue to have these moments for a long time. I spent ten years in a Spanish speaking country, and I still felt like an idiot in most conversations.
Unfortunately, these experiences are a key part of becoming the fluent speaker we all want to be. There is no fantasy moment when you suddenly speak perfect English. Practice is key to improvement. If you want to improve, you have to take part in those awkward conversations, and just try to do the best you can (whilst feeling a bit more stupid than normal).
In conclusion: get back to that conversation, and fake it til you make it.
This isn’t unusual. Learning a skill takes real-life practice, but it also takes real-life messing it up. I got lost in the woods every single time before I learned how orienteering works. I also threw water all over the sauna (and some of the people in it) before I mastered the skill of getting it on to the kiwas. But both of these things were important to me, so I kept going back until I made it work.
Think of it like a new job. The first day, you have no idea what you’re doing. You sit at your desk with nothing to do and wonder, what am I doing here? What is my job? What does this company even do?
So, you do your best. Muddle through. The first day is tough, but by the end of the first week, you feel a bit more comfortable and you’re looking forward to coming in on Monday. After one month, you confidently walk around in your socks complaining that the office doesn’t have any oat milk. At first it was painful, but now you’re loving it.
The point is, speaking in English is hard. An English conversation can be a scary place to be. It can make you feel awkward, uncomfortable and frustrated. But you do what you can. Fake it til you make it. Maybe you won’t understand everything. You probably won’t have all the words you need. You’ll almost certainly feel slow, and a bit stupid. But it’s part of the journey and you’re on the way to getting better.
It’s not nice revealing our weaknesses to the world. If you want some help practising in a friendlier, less intimidating environment, I can help. I won’t judge you nor over correct, I’ll give you space to practise and get comfortable. We’ll focus on the areas that are slowing you down. We can get you ready so that first real-life test, is not so scary after all.
Give me call or send me an email and we can talk about how to help you too.
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